It's funny how the brain works. Take a look at what's inside my head. This is how I "think" I am preparing for my Yoga Teacher Training Program:
I am a little concerned about my wardrobe. I don't have enough yoga clothes to wear for two weeks let alone an entire month and how I will handle laundry still escapes my mind.
I'm not sure I will be able to run. Nosara has dusty roads and if I do manage to get some running done it will certainly be trail running and I don't have trail running shoes. I wonder if wearing my regular shoes will get me injured.
I haven't even asked if I will have hot water in the shower. Damn it! 6:00 AM classes will be not be fun if I have to shower with cold water. Not showering at all may become an option.
Should I bring my yoga mat? That thing is heavy...I should buy some kind of transportation method.
Who will water my basel while I'm gone? Heinz will forget about my plants.
Should I venture into surfing while I'm there? Last time the stingrays warning signs freaked the hell out of me. Even though they are not as frequent these sea creatures do visit the shore once in a while. Getting sting must hurt. Ouch.
I should pack medication...and also a flashlight.
In Nosara there is barely any light at night and I give you the wiggle-your-feet sign. Scary.
If you take a close look at my "preparation list" you will realize...just as I did...that I am not preparing but instead I am worrying.
Of course I have to think about these things but I also have to think about the fun -not stingray related- stuff that I will get to experience.
That is what I tend to do. I focus on things that could go wrong, what to do in case something bad happens and how to avoid uncomfortable situations. I anticipate the negative and put aside the positive. It's not that I'm not aware of the good things but I somehow take them for granted.
I make myself stop when I find myself drifting into over-worrying land -Preppers anyone?-. I tell myself it is ok if I get sting buy a stingray or if my basel drys out -Although Heinz will be held responsible for this- A bad moment doesn't mean a bad day. A bad day doesn't mean a bad month and a bad month doesn't mean a bad year.
I could go on about this...
An ugly argument doesn't mean you have a bad relationship, an unbearable day at work doesn't mean you have a lousy job, a bad run doesn't mean you suck at running...get the point?
It's not always easy to think this way but I feel it helps me put things into perspective.
If you find yourself worrying too much while telling yourself you are mentally preparing....you may want to give this a try.
In the mean time tell me...have you ever seen a stingray up close?
