Heinz is tall and quirky
I'm small and quirki-er.
We met, we took a chance, we fell in-love. We decided that it wasn't such a bad idea to share our life plans and a wedding took place on January 2007.
Almost seven years later we are still together, still sharing, still struggling but hey, still in love.
Having been together 24/7 for what is soon to be two months I've picked up little things that I had taken for granted.
I'm on this quest for self-discovery, facing my fears and finding my own path to whatever (blah blah) when it dawned on me. I noticed, since I can't really ignore the man he's with me ALL THE TIME!, that we too are on a quest for finding balance as a couple.
How much is me in the relationship and how much is Heinz? It's a thin line now. I've picked up a lot of his quirky things and he, bless him, has picked up some of mine.
There are a lot of things that we disagree on -mostly food related- but lately we've been me-tooing a lot. You know that thing when you say something you like/dislike and the other person goes "me tooooo". Well, that.
I usually complain about not having enough quality time together and also about him not talking to me but just letting me carry out these monologues that I vomit and since we've been here I've been a little pushy in trying to get him to be here, present, conversational und so weiter (that's german you know, Heinz says I never use it correctly but I think it fits perfectly fiiiiiiiiine right here)
When I stopped pushing is when I noticed that maybe it was me who wasn't noticing.
We do have "our moments" but I was so busy focusing on what perfect "quality time" had to be like that I was letting them go by unnoticed.
For example:
I like to sleep in, I slept until noon today -hey! no remorse, no judgment- BUT I have noticed that more than sleeping in I really like when we have breakfast together. This is when Heinz is willing to talk about his day, future plans and life in general.
The accompanied silence. Those non-awkward silences when we are together. I'm not scare of them anymore.
I like to read in bed and normally Heinz falls asleep right next to me. He will lightly stroke my arm. That's sooooo him. It's his way of not wanting to disturb but letting me know he's there.
And the best time is while we walk. That is when we have the best talks ever. During long walks.
I used to think it was so annoying to walk next to Heinz because he has this awful habit of getting in my way. I kept pushing, he kept bumping in but as we took a long walk yesterday I thought to myself:
It's about time that I stop trying to straighten his path. It's about time that I -once and for all- let him step into mine.